Wednesday, October 7, 2015

Moose's Weekly Picks

Yuck!  After a stellar week three, Moose gives it all back going 5-9-1 in week four and bumbling the No Doubter.  Let's try to get back on the right track in week five.

INDIANAPOLIS (-1) at HOUSTON: After binge watching Hard Knocks the past two days, I can honestly say I don't have much faith in the Texans.  JJ Watt seems like a fraud, and Brian Cushing is a punk.  The question here though, is whether Plucky Luck will play or not.  Unfortunately, I don't have the luxury of waiting until tomorrow to post this, so I am going to guess that he is not playing.  In which case, I will take the frauds from Houston.  PICK: Houston

JACKSONVILLE (+3) at TAMPA BAY: Famous Jameis didn't look too fucking good last week.  He threw the easiest pick-six I have ever seen in the NFL, and really only got a few touchdowns in garbage time.  This week he has an easier matchup, and when you are on the Famous Jameis bandwagon you never get off.  Hit me with the TD counter! PICK: Tampa

BUFFALO (-2.5) at TENNESSEE: If I can make a Jim Croce reference for a second, "It seems like such a long time ago" that the Bills were going to shake up the AFC East with their powerful defense and mobile quarterback.  Now they are 2-2 and I think Mariota tears them apart this week.  PICK: Tennessee

CLEVELAND (+6.5) at BALTIMORE: Baltimore kept their season alive last Thursday with a crazy win in overtime over Pittsburgh.  Can they keep it going this week?  Maybe, but I think Cleveland keeps it close.  PICK: Cleveland

WASHINGTON (+7.5) at ATLANTA: The Skins were gifted a win last week by the hapless Iggs.  Meanwhile the Falcons are undefeated and blowing teams out.  I don't think the Falcons are as good as they have played so far, but they are good enough to beat the Skins this week in the Dome.  PICK: Hotlanta

CHICAGO (+9.5) at KANSAS CITY: Andy Reid has had trouble outfoxing Jon Fox over the years.  9.5 is also a lot of points to give up.  PICK: Chicago

NEW ORLEANS (+4.5) at PHILADELPHIA: Sammy B looked better last week, but the Iggs were still non-existent for an entire half.  Meanwhile, the Saints played a full game and overcame the Cowboys in overtime.  Gimme the Saints and the points.  The Iggs will probably get booed off the field too.  PICK: New Orleans

ST. LOUIS (+9) at GREEN BAY: The Rams have two big divisional wins, but have looked helpless against everybody else.  Going into Green Bay is not going to help that trend.  PICK: Green Bay

SEATTLE (+3) at CINCINNATI: A true test for the Bungals.  I think they are up to the challenge though.  PICK: Cincy

ARIZONA (-2.5) at DETROIT: A stunning loss in the desert last week blew up my No Doubter and has me feeling lost and confused.  I'll take the Cardinals again on the road to make things right though.  Poor Detroit, looking to go 0-5 to start the season.  PICK: Arizona

NEP (-9) at DALLAS: It would have been easy for the Pats to overlook Dallas with Brandon Weeden at quarterback and the Colts next up on the schedule.  However, Greg Hardy did the NEP a huge favor by opening his scumbag mouth and chirping at Tom Brady.  Now the Cowboys will probably lose by 50.  Book it as my NO DOUBTER.  PICK: NEP

DENVER (-5) at OAKLAND: Things we knew before the season: Peyton Manning's arm is a wet noodle.  Things we didn't know before the season: Denver's defense is really really good.  Like Sideshow Bob with Mayor Quimby, I can't tell if this team is coming or going.  (Side note: one of my worst MS paint cut and paste jobs ever) PICK: Denver

SAN FRANCISCO (+7) at NYG: The NYG are looking up with their defense playing well, and the offense beginning to click.  I think they rout the Niners here.  PICK: NYG

PITTSBURGH (+3) at SAN DIEGO: Time for San Diego to giddy up and go.  Antonio Gates returning from suspension will help them.  Martavis Bryant returning from suspension will help Pittsburgh.  Both will help my fantasy team.  PICK: Blitzburgh

LAST WEEK: 5-9-1
OVERALL: 31-30-2

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